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Sunday 22 July 2007

7 Ps of Parent Child Relationships and Godly Living

The 7 Ps of Parent Child Relationships and Godly living

1. Protection

Parents are in the protection business. However it may appear on the surface, parents feel an obligation to protect their children. Equally, children rely on parents for protection. Life is not too dangerous under the protective wings of the parent.

The implication for Godly living is that this is the type of relationship that God wants to have with us as His children. He is clear about His commitment to protecting His children and He wants us to shelter under His wings.

14 For the LORD your God moves about in your camp to protect you and to deliver your enemies to you. Deut 23:14

15 My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. Jn 17:15

3 But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. 2Thes 3:3

2. Providence

Parents have a sense of obligation to provide for the ones that they helped to bring into this world. No one looks favourably upon a father who is unable or unwilling to provide for his children. Children learn to rely on good parents to provide for their needs. This fundamental assurance provides a solid foundation for them to get on with their daily living. They do not have to worry about their next meal and they are able to channel their thoughts into other areas.

What about our heavenly Father? Is He a reliable provider? Can we reasonably leave Him to take care of us?

Gen 22:3 Early the next morning Abraham got up and saddled his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut enough wood for the burnt offering, he set out for the place God had told him about.
4 On the third day Abraham looked up and saw the place in the distance. 5 He said to his servants, “Stay here with the donkey while I and the boy go over there. We will worship and then we will come back to you.”
6 Abraham took the wood for the burnt offering and placed it on his son Isaac, and he himself carried the fire and the knife. As the two of them went on together, 7 Isaac spoke up and said to his father Abraham, “Father?”
“Yes, my son?” Abraham replied.
“The fire and wood are here,” Isaac said, “but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?”
8 Abraham answered, “God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son.” And the two of them went on together.
9 When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. 10 Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son.
11 But the angel of the LORD called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied.
12 “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
13 Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. 14 So Abraham called that place The LORD Will Provide. And to this day it is said, “On the mountain of the LORD it will be provided.”
15 The angel of the LORD called to Abraham from heaven a second time 16 and said, “I swear by myself, declares the LORD, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son,
17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me.”

Parents will happily lavish bountiful gifts on obedient children.

7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
9 “Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! Matt 7:7 – 11

Rom 8: 28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

An aside: Note that Abraham was willing to sacrifice Isaac in obedience to God. The love for God must transcend all other loves. Love for sons, wife, things, even self. Parents should not protect and defend their children at the risk at losing favour with God.

3. Prodding

Children are not cattle, but sometimes they need a little prodding to get them moving and moving in the right direction.

Our heavenly Father also has that problem with us!

Jonah 1: 8 So they asked him, “Tell us, who is responsible for making all this trouble for us? What do you do? Where do you come from? What is your country? From what people are you?”
9 He answered, “I am a Hebrew and I worship the LORD, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the land.”
10 This terrified them and they asked, “What have you done?” (They knew he was running away from the LORD, because he had already told them so.)
11 The sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked him, “What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?”
12 “Pick me up and throw me into the sea,” he replied, “and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you.”
16 At this the men greatly feared the LORD, and they offered a sacrifice to the LORD and made vows to him.
17 But the LORD provided a great fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was inside the fish three days and three nights.
3:1 Then the word of the LORD came to Jonah a second time: 2 “Go to the great city of Nineveh and proclaim to it the message I give you.”
3 Jonah obeyed the word of the LORD and went to Nineveh
.

Some parents tell their children that they do not expect to have to issue the same instructions more than once to get obedience. How much more should we be quick to obey the all powerful God, our maker?

Luke 12:4 “I tell you, my friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more. 5 But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear him who, after the killing of the body, has power to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear him.

4. Pride

Most parents have a sense of pride about their children. They somehow feel that having been involved with the processing of the other Ps that we have dealt with, they have earned the right to feel that they are linked to end product. The more the child fits the pattern that they consider desirable the greater the feeling of satisfaction and level of pride. This in turn sometimes motivates children to make an extra effort to achieve certain objectives. “This one is for you Mom or Dad”.

What about God? Does He take pride in His obedient children who fit the pattern that He has established? Ought we not to strive to be obedient to His will so that He too can take pride in our achievements?

1 Peter 2 :9 But ye are an elect race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession, that ye may show forth the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvellous light: 10who in time past were no people, but now are the people of God: who had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy. (Am Standard)

“That is MY child!!” What should we give to able to have God recognize us as being one of His elect, a part of His royal priesthood, one of His people???

5. Patience

Some parents have to face the reality that their offspring have not quite made it to the lofty standards that they have set for the children. They are concerned about the pace of development and get frustrated at persistent weaknesses and failings. They may even wonder if all their efforts have been in vain.

Other parents understand that it might take time for their children to fit the pattern that they have set for them. They take this into consideration and set aside their concern and frustration. Instead they lavish love, support and encouragement. Those things are available to you not from what you do but from who you are.

Sensitive children can detect the growing concern of parents and try to adjust their behaviour to give hope to them. They try to avoid pushing their parents to frustration by re-doubling their efforts. There is renewed motivation to achieve goals.

All children get a boost to their self-worth when they are made to feel confident that father’s love and support is not dependent on what they achieve but on who they are.

What about our Eternal Father?

He is patient and understanding when we fall short of His requirements. He actually makes arrangements to deal with our failings.

2 Peter 3 :8 But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. 9 The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

1 John 1:8 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.
2 My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. 2 He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.

6. Punishment

Earthly parents punish their children in the hope that it will help them to develop along acceptable lines. Two passages give us clear insight into the philosophy of our heavenly Father.

Sometimes as parents we are reluctant to discipline our children out of some mistaken sense of love. The account of Saul and Jonathan shows the level of earnestness that one father had with respect to obedience to God, above all else!!!!

1 Sam 14:41 Then Saul prayed to the LORD, the God of Israel, “Give me the right answer.” And Jonathan and Saul were taken by lot, and the men were cleared. 42 Saul said, “Cast the lot between me and Jonathan my son.” And Jonathan was taken.
43 Then Saul said to Jonathan, “Tell me what you have done.”
So Jonathan told him, “I merely tasted a little honey with the end of my staff. And now must I die?”
44 Saul said, “May God deal with me, be it ever so severely, if you do not die, Jonathan.”
45 But the men said to Saul, “Should Jonathan die—he who has brought about this great deliverance in Israel? Never! As surely as the LORD lives, not a hair of his head will fall to the ground, for he did this today with God’s help.” So the men rescued Jonathan, and he was not put to death.

What about our heavenly Father? What is His approach to punishment and discipline?

Acts 17:29 “Therefore since we are God’s offspring, we should not think that the divine being is like gold or silver or stone—an image made by man’s design and skill. 30 In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent. 31 For he has set a day when he will judge the world with justice by the man he has appointed. He has given proof of this to all men by raising him from the dead.”

Hebrews 12: 4 In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5 And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:
“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, 6 because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”
7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8 If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9 Moreover, we have all had human parents who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10 Our parents disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

7. Place

Finally, parents seek to find a safe and secure place for their children. Parents take great comfort from the fact that offspring have safe shelter. Part of the joy that would have come to the father of the prodigal son is the fact that that night he could sleep with the assurance that his son was in a secure place and not at risk.

What about our heavenly Father? What is His take on this?

He has provided a safe and secure place for us. It is called the Church.

Matt 16: 13 When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say the Son of Man is?”
14 They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”
15 “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”
16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”
17 Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven. 18 And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it. 19 I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.”

Acts 2: 36 “Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.”
37 When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?”
38 Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”
40 With many other words he warned them; and he pleaded with them, “Save yourselves from this corrupt generation.” 41 Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.

42 They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43 Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. 44 All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45 Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. 46 Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47 praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

What about you? Are you an obedient child to your heavenly Father? Are you in residence in the secure place He has provided for you? Are you part of His elect, His royal priesthood? Will He be pleased to number you among His children?

If you are a part of His elect, are you frustrating Him? Are you living to the standards that He has set for you? Are you keen to make Him proud of you?

This is the challenge to you today. Make this day a happy day for your heavenly Father!!!!

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